In a world that values individualism and personal autonomy, the biblical call to honor one’s father and mother might seem like a countercultural instruction. However, Scripture holds honoring parents as an essential commandment, and its significance stretches across both the Old and New Testaments. The Bible’s direction to honor father and mother is not merely a formality, but an integral part of how individuals relate to God and others.
This article delves deeply into what it means to honor one’s parents through biblical teachings, examining its foundational scriptures and the implications this commandment holds for modern-day life.
Understanding the Biblical Command to Honor Parents
The concept of honoring one’s father and mother originates from one of the Ten Commandments, which were given to Moses on Mount Sinai. This divine law states:
“Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be prolonged in the land which the Lord your God gives you.”
— Exodus 20:12 (NASB)
This commandment is powerful not only for its direct instruction but for the promise that accompanies it: the well-being and longevity of life in the land God provides. God made it clear that honoring parents was tied directly to His plans for blessing His people.
While this command is often reduced to an obligation to simply obey parents, its deeper meaning includes reverence, respect, and a position of humility. This makes it a living principle that applies throughout one’s life, regardless of age or circumstance.
Old Testament Foundation
In addition to Exodus 20:12, we find the command to honor father and mother reaffirmed throughout Scripture, emphasizing the high value placed on parental authority. One key verse in this regard is from the book of Leviticus:
“Every one of you shall reverence his mother and his father, and you shall keep My sabbaths; I am the Lord your God.”
— Leviticus 19:3 (NASB)
Here, honoring parents is coupled with the keeping of the Sabbath, indicating that honoring one’s parents is deeply connected to obedience to God’s commands. Reverence, in the context of Leviticus, speaks not merely to outward actions but an attitude of deep respect.
Proverbs also speaks on honoring parents by juxtaposing it with wisdom. In Proverbs 1:8, we see:
“Hear, my son, your father’s instruction And do not forsake your mother’s teaching;”
— Proverbs 1:8 (NASB)
The relationship between children and their parents is depicted as vital to growing in wisdom and knowledge. Listening to and respecting one’s parents is essential for gaining understanding in life. Similarly, in Proverbs 6:20-22:
“My son, observe the commandment of your father And do not forsake the teaching of your mother; Bind them continually on your heart; Tie them around your neck. When you walk about, they will guide you; When you sleep, they will watch over you; And when you awake, they will talk to you.”
— Proverbs 6:20-22 (NASB)
This passage portrays parental guidance as something that influences all parts of life, symbolizing an ongoing relationship that never ends.
Moreover, in Deuteronomy 5:16, we find a strong reiteration of the commandment:
“Honor your father and your mother, as the Lord your God has commanded you, that your days may be prolonged and that it may go well with you on the land which the Lord your God gives you.”
— Deuteronomy 5:16 (NASB)
These Old Testament laws and wisdom sayings highlight how parental authority was integral to Israel’s formation as a nation. By obeying parents, children obey God Himself, which is critical for maintaining a harmonious and righteous society.
The New Testament’s Emphasis on Honoring Parents
In the New Testament, the command to honor father and mother continues to carry profound weight. Jesus Christ Himself both modeled and taught the importance of honoring one’s parents, showing it as an extension of reverence for God.
One of the most notable examples of Jesus’ teaching about honoring parents comes in Matthew 15:4, where He underscores the inviolable nature of this commandment:
“For God said, ‘Honor your father and mother,’ and, ‘He who speaks evil of father or mother is to be put to death.’’”
— Matthew 15:4 (NASB)
This interaction reveals that Jesus saw the commandment not just as a cultural practice but as a divine and serious matter, maintaining the sanctity of this command in the New Covenant.
Paul, a key New Testament writer, also emphasizes the necessity of honoring parents in his letters. In Ephesians 6:1-3, Paul gives direct instruction to children:
“Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honor your father and mother (which is the first commandment with a promise), so that it may be well with you, and that you may live long on the earth.”
— Ephesians 6:1-3 (NASB)
Here, the reference to the commandment as the “first commandment with a promise” connects this principle with the idea of blessing and well-being that comes from God’s favor. When children honor their parents, they align themselves with God’s will and experience a life marked by peace and purpose.
Similarly, in Colossians 3:20, Paul reinforces the same idea:
“Children, be obedient to your parents in all things, for this is well-pleasing to the Lord.”
— Colossians 3:20 (NASB)
Honoring parents is described as directly pleasing to the Lord, further tying obedience to parental authority as a reflection of a faithful and obedient heart toward God Himself.
In these passages, we find the act of honoring one’s parents framed not as a simple requirement of duty but as an act of faith. Honoring parents is an opportunity to demonstrate a person’s relationship with God through their relationship with their earthly parents.
Jesus’ Example of Honoring Parents
The life of Jesus serves as the ultimate example of honoring one’s father and mother. Despite His divine nature and calling, Jesus never dismissed the authority of His earthly parents. In Luke 2:51-52, after the incident in the temple, we see:
“And He went down with them and came to Nazareth, and He continued in subjection to them; and His mother treasured all these things in her heart. And Jesus kept increasing in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and men.”
— Luke 2:51-52 (NASB)
This moment, in which Jesus submits Himself to the care and authority of Mary and Joseph, underscores His deep respect for His earthly parents. Even though He is fully aware of His divine mission, Jesus honored His earthly parents, perfectly fulfilling the commandment.
Furthermore, when Jesus was on the cross, He demonstrated care and concern for His mother, entrusting her to the disciple John in John 19:26-27:
“When Jesus then saw His mother, and the disciple whom He loved standing nearby, He said to His mother, “Woman, behold, your son!” Then He said to the disciple, “Behold, your mother!” From that hour the disciple took her into his own household.”
— John 19:26-27 (NASB)
Even in His final hours, Jesus exemplified the deep bond of filial love and responsibility, ensuring that His mother would be cared for after His death. This act not only reveals the emotional and familial bond but also underscores the seriousness with which Christ viewed the commandment to honor one’s parents.
Practical Applications of Honoring Parents Today
As believers in Christ, understanding the biblical call to honor father and mother involves more than just obeying commands. The act of honoring parents is multifaceted and involves an expression of love, respect, care, and ultimately worship toward God. Here are some practical ways in which individuals can honor their parents today:
- Respectful Obedience
For young children, obeying parents in all things according to God’s Word is essential. Obeying in a spirit of humility shows the child’s reverence for God and the parental authority God has placed in their lives. - Expressing Gratitude
Even as adults, children are called to express thanks for the care and sacrifice of their parents. Small tokens of appreciation, words of affirmation, and acts of kindness can go a long way in honoring parents. - Providing Care in Their Old Age
Honoring parents involves providing physical, emotional, and financial care when needed. Scripture speaks about the responsibility of children to care for their aging parents, reflecting God’s covenantal promise to bless those who honor their parents. - Fostering Peace and Unity
Honoring one’s parents involves maintaining peace and unity in relationships, even when there are disagreements. Christians are called to be peacemakers, extending grace to their parents just as God has extended grace to them. - Imitating God’s Compassion
Just as God extends mercy and grace to His children, honoring parents includes offering forgiveness when conflicts arise, and extending compassion in times of weakness or failure.
Conclusion
Honoring one’s father and mother is more than a directive to follow a set of rules—it is a recognition of God’s design for family and authority. As demonstrated in both the Old and New Testaments, honoring parents carries a promise of blessing, security, and divine favor. The principle transcends cultural differences, making it timeless and eternally relevant to believers in all walks of life.
Ultimately, honoring father and mother is an act of worship—honoring them is akin to honoring the God who created the family. By doing so, believers reflect God’s love, His justice, and His wisdom in their homes and beyond. In honoring parents, we learn the deeper truth that in honoring others, we honor God.